Traditions were made to be broken?

Once upon a time - when our boys were very very little, this young wife of J*ff put her foot down and said that it was time to create "our own" family traditions.  We had packed up our kids at the crack of dawn on Christmas morning for the last time to head to his parents house.  We were going to start our own traditions.  This was the year. He had grown up with more traditions than my family and we learned others along the way. 

His family went to church on Christmas Eve.  My family went to my Grandpa's or there was that one time mom made bouillabaisse and everyone came to our house.  The kids didn't eat, the house smelled like fish puke and I remember the dress I was wearing as I held my baby cousin Andrea and plugged my nose while the adults ate fish soup.  Guhhhh rosssss!

His family opened one gift that night.  We opened all of ours.

I guess that's only two.  Perhaps it was all of the things now that I consider as OUR traditions that made me think there were more back then.  And perhaps there were, but I don't remember a lot of my childhood, I think I was made that way by design.

I used to put up the Dickens Village all by myself the same day we brought home the tree.  Now Zach carries up all the boxes for me sometime before we have our trees and once I unpack them, he returns the boxes back downstairs.  For two years now - I've threatened to not put them up, but then one of the boys says "But mom, it's a tradition."  Yes... yes it is.  But next year - Zach won't be here and it's a f-load of work to do. 

We used to buy our tree from a lot until we heard about this little place on 65th that sold trees, any tree for $15!!  Fresh cut trees.  So we did that until the year of the spider tree.  Then we heard about this place an hour + out north and have gone there for the last 12 years or so.  With the exception of the two years they closed down due to needing to let their trees grow!  Actually, the first year we found some spot out in Deer Park where pit bulls greeted us and the Karstetters when we got out of our cars.  It did end up being a great trip and great tree though... the next year I called out to Camden Ranch to see if they were letting anyone at all come to cut trees and they said if we did it between two dates, and didn't advertise it, we could come out.  So...  there's that.  Then after the remodel last year - the "tradition" grew from one tree to two.  Again, next year, no Zach to talk me into it - I just can't see it happening right now.

The last decoration to go up is the stockings, hung by the chimney with care.

We always go to First Pres for Christmas Eve service and usually head home, sometimes to friends and other times with my parents, at our home, for cracked crab.  And on Christmas, we have always done dinner here and my parents have come.  Even when Jeff's parents were alive, it was still just my parents because his mom wanted her traditions as they had always been.  

We are creatures of habit, are we not?

So this year - we're changing it up.  After a message came across my phone in early December, late one night, I knew that we had to change it up.  Don't get me wrong, there have been times that I struggled with this idea. Making a change.  So long tradition.  Change is hard.  Well change is hard when you love something, when you are attached to something, when you value something.  When I talked to Jeff he said "Yep."  Then we pitched it to the boys and Zach said "Yep".  We got a muffled response from the grunter of the family and an understanding nod and agreement from Blue Eyes.  (Ryan... our only blue eyed boy!)  But as with all things, with time, came acceptance and excitement and a realization that change is good, or can be good.  

Tis the season of giving and this year, while I'm currently still not working, our "giving" won't be so abundant.  But we can give of ourselves to help those who need it most.  We can give our ears, hands, hearts to help those we know will need it more than we do.  

There's nothing wrong with traditions and we will likely go back to ours next year, though... if I'm being honest, with the boys "all growed up", I'm trending towards more of a friends' gig on Christmas eve or day with lots of snacky foods and banter, versus the traditional meal.  I'm ready for change.  There come times throughout our lives where change is going to happen.  Needs to happen.  Implementing it is the hardest thing - but each day, thinking about it - it gets more exciting!