Now Departing... 2011

It's the end of the party... 

Now's the time for us to say - 

Happy New Year

Happy New Year

May we all have a vision

Now and then

Of a world where every neighbor is a friend...

~Abba

It's an hour before we head out to Hugo's to bowl with friends and I've been contemplating this post most of the day.  As I sit here now, I realize, that I barked at Jeff a few times and I know now that it was because I was trying to figure out what inspiring, hopeful, candid, New Years'y kind of post I could write - all the while knowing my thoughts were more serene.

Not because I am out of mindless ideas or diatribe... but because this is the time for reflection of 2011 and we had the highest high this year with our family getting to travel to watch Jeff and the EWU Eagles win the National Championship and how awe inspired we were by his efforts and how much fun that was for our family.  How proud his brothers were, and us of all of them as they took in that win on the field.  We also had the lowest low with the loss of the boys' cousin Sarah.  And as I sit here at this very moment, I'm more consumed with that.  And I'm saddened that she's not here on what would be her 21st New Years, with her family and friends.

And I think of her family tonight as they reel with an unexpected illness and journey ahead of them and I want to look up and say "Okay.  Enough is enough.  Pick on some other family now."  So I say it here... and I've thought it.  And even if, by some chance, "He" listened - granted me this wish - it won't change what's happened to them all this year.  And it won't take away the battle ahead of them.

It's hard to know this and look to 2012 and wonder if the words "Happy New Year" will bring about feelings of hope, cheer, healing - it's hard to believe it would be so.  

<sigh>

New Years Resolutions:

1)  To say what I feel and believe, and trust my heart.  I may be wrong, I may stick my foot in my mouth or worse - but I know that I feel better when my heart leads me.

2)  To remember to send a card to everyone for their birthday.  No matter what.  It may be 3 days late or 19 days late, but it WILL come during their birth MONTH.  If I don't know their birthday exactly, utmost apologies.  I'm not good about remembering birthdays.  Sorry.  But my childhood phone number is RI7-5554.  Remember those days?

3)  More handmade "gifts" next year.  Felt good to make them this year and make myself spend time thinking about what and who.  I forgot some - but in doing so, that helped me to take the time to remember details.

4)  Buy a new pair of shoes every month.  ;-)